Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Show me the inventor of Cribs!

And he will rue the day! Recently I posted a picture on my facebook account of the crib that is apparently not to be slept in! Many laughed at my plight! I have read all the children books, and listened very closely to the pediatricians.. who tell you to put the baby in the crib and walk away! My baby thinks that is a cue to
1. Start screaming the house down
2. Join me in a game of throwing her teddy bear out and me pick it up
3. Bounce in the crib in sheer glee, till she goes back to step 1
As a result the crib is never slept in! And the devilish Dad does not fail to remind me how I ordered the crib and assembled it all in 1 hour because my daughter absolutely needed it.

To tell this story right I must start at the very beginning. Lets go back a couple of years.. to a time when we had one kid who had ordered a bed of his own in his own room and promised to spend his night sleeping (or as he most likely was.. bouncing) in his own bed! The parents decided it was time to buy a new bed for themselves! And why stop short.. so they went to the store got greedy and bought a giant king sized mattress! After all we were promised sleep after 5 years of kicks and prods! Well 2 hrs of it anyway, after that the brand new bunk bed in Cheeky's room got too lumpy and the room was just too cold to be slept in! Who could blame him eh?

Anyway, we were so pleased with ourselves! What with our king bed and all! And then we moved to California! And rented a match box to live in! And decided to have baby 2. Now where would baby sleep in? Hey we could not be expected to share right? So we bought her a little travel crib with a cute bassinet, and settled for sliding in sideways in and out of the room! But the bassinet was just not right.... so right from the start Tootsie knew just what to do when she was asked to sleep.. climb into mommy's bed!

Months later, we moved into a bigger house with more room, and decided (OK I Decided, it was time for a crib). So I made this big story about my daughter waking up and rolling off the 4 ft tall bed (really what were we thinking huh?).. and bought and assembled the crib! Since then it stands there in our bedroom a silent reminder of my folly! The hubs just bursts into hysterical mirth.. especially in the wee hours of the morning when Cheeky finds his lumps and climbs in next to mommy!

So I decided on a quiet night when the hubs was out of town I will work a miracle.. I lulled the little minx to sleep and quietly put her in her crib and tip toed all the way to the family room, and curled up in front of the television! Lo behold the screams arrived (in about 30 seconds!).. feeling sorry for the little one, and silently admonishing my maternal instincts I put her next to me and started to curl up next to her!  Only to be kicked away! That is the rule of climbing into mommy's bed.. if you did not know that.. kick her out! I must admit though, after 7 years of this, without that kick to my spine.. I would hardly wake up rejuvinated from my sleep!

Now I ask you.. what are those good books and pediatricians talking about? And the inventor of cribs .. well he (for only a guy could have done this) for sure did not have any children!

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Job Profile: Model/Actress (in training!)

It dawned upon me a couple of days back! My daughter is growing to be an actress.. for sure! All the sign were there... but my dim witted self needed some prodding before enlightenment dawned for sure!
At 3 months her doctor told me "She is a strong personality" .. while I knew that meant in mommy-ese, she is a stubborn, hard headed little girl, it did not occur to me that this was a sign, a signal .... telling me her life direction!
But lately, the cloud is clearing up, and I can see the future! You think I am kidding?
Carbs are the enemy - Tootsie hates carbs, and make sure she does not have too much of them! On any given day, she nibbles on her food. She hates carbs of any kind, I have tried rice, pasta, wheat, quinoa, you name it! She prefers to nibble on little bites, and stay focussed on her diet! Her doctor told me that she was "really skinny" for a baby! And she wasnt even walking yet!
A strict regime is essential - She is always on the move, getting her tummy crunches, cardio and other exercises in! If it means, mommy has to be kept in shape too.. so be it (My body however cares less, after all the running behind the little pixie, my BMI stays put!)
Less is More - She believes in a co-ordinated wardrobe, but less is the operative word! Earlier this week, I had dressed her in stockings and skirt. While I was otherwise occupied doing diaper changes, she lost the stockings and insisted it was to be just the short skirt.. Showing legs are a good thing apparently!! That night we were at a block party on our street, she proved her point by taking of her socks and slamming it to the ground!
Show me the Money - She loves her Dad's wallet, and does not give it up! EVER!
Walk the talk - She also loves the phone and continues to hoard that too!
Center of Attention - Always the show girl, she socialises wherever we set foot! She proved this at the same block party,as we laughed to some joke, we heard a pronounced "hahaha".. all eyes turned to our very own Show girl! Guess who the Center of Attention is now? (Fist in air)
Prettiest of All - We cant talk much, but can definitely stroke our own cheeks and say "Pyaara Pyaara" (Lovely). And ask her who the pretty princess is? Guess who that would be?
The actress - And she can act.. not that that is essential.. but she walked around the room this afternoon (strutted should I say?) .. as much as she could.. we are now mastering the penguin walk, but it is the cat walk next for sure! Every once in a while she would stop and put her head down on the ground and say "Thaachi" (Lie down.. short hand for sleep), and close her eyes! Apparently she knows the importance of beauty nap.. even if she is only acting!
Charming is the magic word - Tootsie knows that the way to get her way is being charming! She woos us with her kisses and sweet talks! And if nothing else works, turn on the magic tantrums... just cry like a baby!!
And I rest my case (as always)! I guess now dad needs to start worrying! Martial arts and Gun shopping?

The Elf on the Shelf! Me Too!!

So after years of avoiding the marketing gimmick of "Elf on the Shelf" I finally succumbed to the pressure and popular demand. I ...