Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Do not test me!

We don't take to testing. At all. That's the challenge of the year. We are having terrible 6's in our household. Earlier in the year we hated math because of fast facts. There was so much drama till I had to teach her how to not care how she did. Which of course means she tells me "Mommy I did better than yday and that's all that matters".
In counting on the  last report card she made a 2 grade. Which translates to "approaching standards". All other math standards were at 3 or 4 (exceeds std). That was puzzling.. the teacher said she was asked to count to 120 but apparently only did to 100. Ask the pixie "They didn't ask me to stop so I thought 100 is a big number. They Must Be Really Tired Listening. And I stopped."
Accelerated Reading  (AR) is the most miserable story. She reads her books but refuses to take any tests. We have tried every single tactic but nothing helps. I hate comparing my kids to other kids, but thought thats a tried and tested method "peer motivation"!  She told her friend in unequivocal terms "Lets talk about something else" and me "Mom I am unique! Do you want to be X's mom? No right? Then stop talking about her" Oh Well! Since when do 6 yr olds talk like this?

I guess we will just have to wait to meet Math standards and take tests! After all this is the same kid who went to an eye exam and refused to open her mouth. She was 2 and they were showing her pictures of objects and the objects kept getting smaller and Tootsie stopped talking. Mom and Doctor were bewildered. "Why arent you saying anything, cant you see what it is?" 
"I told you already. You are not listening!" She said. So there went the eye exam, we were just left guessing how well she could see!

Some kids are just not test takers I guess. Only option now is to change the education system!

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

In a league of her own

I am re-learning parenting this time around. None of the parenting tricks I have learnt works, and re-learning is not an option. No parenting book or self help website is of any use with this new brand of kid we have produced. For Tootsie is truly in a league of her own!

But life never lacks for entertainment. Thats a given. We get these elaborate feminist notes taped on our wall. Be it about the fact that "Boys are not allowed in our room.. except Daddy and boys that sometimes need to sleep in the room"

Or a venn diagram about the likes and differences between gingr bred man and grl! Here is a picture

Yes kindergartener's are being taught about venn diagrams. And my little pixie thought this was a good opportunity to put together some feminist thoughts. After all she is the kid who turned every rhyme to the feminine gender. We can't let boys have all the fun can we?

How do you make friends? For years I have taught my kids to be friendly. If you see a kid who doesnt have a friend, go be friendly. If you see a new kid at school be her friend. Always pick the right thing to do.. and blah, blah and blah.

So guess what Ms. Firebrand does when she sees a kid sitting by herself on the ground

Mom I saw this girl sitting by herself on the playground. So I went and asked her "Are you new?"
She said "Yes"
I asked "Do you have any friends?"
The girl said "No"

At this point you would assume the obvious. But here is where we are in a league of her own

Tootsie "So I told her ...let me teach you how to make friends. You walk up to someone who you want to play with and ask 'Hi can I be your friend. What would you like to play'. And then you just play what they like to play"

The clueless mom ofcourse had to ask "But Tootsie couldnt you be her friend? Maybe include her in your game?"

Tootsie "No mom I have my friends I want to play with"

So there we have the whole concept of lead the horse to the water down pat!

And there is more. One day Tootsie comes up to me and says "Mom is that a need or a want?" So now everytime I want something I am asked "Is that a need or a want?" Everytime she needs something "Its a need". But I need toys, how else will I play? And when I explained to her what need and want really is she changes that to "But I need toys to grow smarter"

Sigh!! This little fire brand has us dancing to her tunes! She has us fumbling at parenting and giving up.. we are just guided by the little missy.

The Elf on the Shelf! Me Too!!

So after years of avoiding the marketing gimmick of "Elf on the Shelf" I finally succumbed to the pressure and popular demand. I ...