Tuesday, October 14, 2008

A note from Ms Butter Fingers

My tryst with destiny started at an early age. I was 2 when I had my first accident. This I don't remember.. so what I say here is just hearsay! I had sneaked into the bathroom yet again... and stood under the tap playing with the water and getting completely drenched.. while at it I jutted my chin against the tap (testing its strength?).. Considering that I have lived to tell the tale and it took only half a dozen stitches to stem the flow.. I guess it was worth the experiment?

When I was 4 girls my age had started to stand around and gossip. Not to mention worry about their skirts / pinafores getting dirty when they do stunts on the jungle gym! But I was one of the few who paid no heed to gender discrimination. So I spent my time scaling walls and hanging upside down on jungle gyms. On one such occasion I banged my head and even had blood gushing out! No stitches were needed I think! But I remember distinctly my embarrassment when I was asked to go "rest my head" aka sleep with the 3 yr olds while my class mates went on to sit prim and proper in their seats and attend school. This mortification is my earliest memory (what a one to have right?). But this episode kept me off trouble for a few years.. either that or it was luck! I bet on the latter because as the years passed I mastered the art of scaling walls, climbing trees, rolling under vehicles and so on...

But it was not these acts of abandon that led to my next accident. It was an unfortunate fall in the bathroom again. I seem to have a lot of luck with water right? It was the morning of an exam (we had what was called mid terms then.. about a month before the final exams for the year). I was shooed to the bathroom to get ready. There was a big rock in the bathroom to close the drain and keep away rats.. this rock was moved to keep the drain open in the morning and then closed again at night to keep away the rats! And I slipped and fell and landed my hand on the rock. I feared my mom's wrath "you had another accident?" so tried to pretend nothing was wrong.. but had to fess up and find out that I had my first ever fracture! My right arm too.. aah what a deal I did not have to write another exam that year!

The very next year I climbed up a cupboard and hung on precarious balance while I looked for some treasure atop the Almira placed next to the cupboard. But as you can imagine.. slipped and fell for the second time that week (I had earlier landed on the same arm while climbing a tree to get some mangoes!).. And so happened the fracture of my left hand! This time it was no fun.. for people were tired of my accidents and no one wanted to bestow pity! Also being left hand that was fractured I was not awarded any lenience at school and still had to write all assignments and exams! The mean people!

But I soon discovered accidents were no fun and turned my attention to books and more lady like pranks.. till I had a baby. No No No.. I can see where your thoughts are turning.. fast forward another year. Cheeky was 1 and I was rushing to get to a function at a cousins place. We lived in India then and in our new house had cordoned off the stairway with giant wooden gates. Since you did not get ready made plastic gates like in the US we had the carpenter scustom make this for us and they were huge. So it was probably not a good idea to try and pull it out while wearing a saree and carrying atleast 4 bags of things not to mention the little imp in my hand.. I dropped the gate on my feet and my left little toe began to swell up almost immediately. I ignored it to go to the function and later at my uncle's place he dragged me to a doctor to give me a tetanus. When the swelling had not subsided after 2 days not to mention the pain, it was discovered that the toe was fractured and I was put on bed rest! Haah... you can imagine how that went.. I hopped around the house while my aunt and cousin tried to baby sit the little brat.. not to mention M taking a week off to cook and baby sit! I did enjoy all the attention!

Tired already? But thats not the end of it. Another year later.. I had just moved to California from New Jersey (If you have been reading this blog for a while, you are aware of my restless feet.. which brings me to the award Shraikh gave me.. I digress, but had to mention that..
Thanks Shraikh. I will make another post on this soon.. but had to gloat now!)

Back to my monologue on Miss Butter fingers.. So I had moved to California and my car had still not made the cross country trip. So as we sat there car-less in California I had a brilliant idea. I would make Kurma for dinner. It was 8 Pm and my stomach was rumbling aloud.. so I grabbed the block of coconut from the freezer (what had become a block but was meant to be shredded coconut) and grabbed the butcher knife (I can hear the collective gasp) to cut into it. At that very instant Cheeky ran out of the bedroom almost into the wall up ahead and as I yelled "Cheeky" ... cut.. I cut into my thumb!! As the blood oozed out I looked at it and instinctively knew something was wrong... I wrapped a towel around it and told M "I think we need to call 911". "For a cut" he started.. but he is not my husband for nothing.. we know that I am a magnet for accidents.. so a friend was called and I was driven to the hospital. I sat there and bravely told them that the degree of pain I felt was 4-5 on a scale of 10. I was told I need stitches and made to wait till 3 am. Meanwhile M and Cheeky were sent home while the friend waited with me. At 3 am the doctor was about to switch the wound up when I thoughtfully asked.. do you think I could have cut a nerve ending or something? The doctor looked at me in disbelief.. but wheeled me to one of those scary rooms with huge lights that move right over your head and sure enough I had ruptured a tendon! Are you sure you are not in anymore pain he asked me? But I am an experienced girl.. ain't I?
A week later I was operated on (a micro surgery) that left me groggy with anesthesia! Months later the cast went off.. but not before I endured twice a week physio therapy for my left thumb! But the good news is.. had I not thought to ask that question that night, I would have lost complete use of my thumb in a week!

Its been 2 years since that last accident and I type freely with my thumb. So far so good.. from accident prone land... signing off...
Ms Butter Fingers

(Images: http://www.thefreedictionary.com, http://forbiddenplanet.co.uk/ and some)

[PS Last night as I tripped and fell once again.. I felt a distinct Deja vu.. M rushed to me and asked "Are you sure nothing is broken?". No nothing is.. even if I sat there in the passage way and laughed hysterically.. while a bewlidered Cheeky and M looked on. M searched my head for a clot... but found none!! Yeah I think there is one thing worse than my butter fingers.. my crazy ways? I can see some of you read this blog shaking your head in disbelief.. but be rest assured I am none the worse for wear!]

27 comments:

Fantasies of a Lifetime said...

u sure its just ur fingers that are buttered ? How about wrapping urself in those bubble covers ??

Sandhya said...

That's the just way too many accidents! Are you sure they were not intentional....hehe!

Suma said...

u must be my sister's twin...

but the last one was scary...*shudder...

take care..ms butter fingers...we like you :D

Rambler said...

oh oh that was too many accidents for a post :)...

I guess I can be termed a total opposite to you after reading this one :D

Sumana said...

I was reading with an Ahhh all through the post. Take care girl. But ya there are somethings that just can't be avoided. It just happens. For everything else 911.

Mama - Mia said...

and i thought i was bad!

got my little finger cut in one of those swivelling door at age 2 and have stitches to show for it! :p

had a fractured foot when in 4th standard and 3 weeks rest!

hit my head on the tap and had some blood to show for it and then a clot when it was healing!

a mark on my knee when i fell off my darling scooty!

a little tedha elbow which had dislocated after a fall from my dear Dio!

but, yeah nothing that came close to being unusable because of an accident!

you go girl! :D

and stay safe, will ya?!

cheers!

abha

rayshma said...

the last one was scary, gurl!
and u better take care...

U-t-h-r-a said...

may be the blog is good to read, but when I think of your pain..Uff...take care ma'am....

Preethi said...

Vish - Good idea but for sure I would wobble and fall
Sandhya - Intentional? you think God intended it? Blasphemy??
Suma - Yeah the last one was the worst.. I was a little shaken too.. not to mention in physio therapy for 3 months.. twice a week.. that has taught me to be careful!!
Rambler - You extra cautious? Actually I never intentionally get into scrapes.. I never even ride the roller coaster !!:P
Sumana - just cant be avoided right.. I thought it was just me.. thanks for the vote!! :)

Preethi said...

Abha - Alright!! I think we are officially in competition for the title!!
Raysh - Scary? one accident is scary.. one after another gets only hysterically funny!!
Udu - You know me better than that? When has pain kept me down eh?

Robin said...

My goodness! You'd better wrap yourself up carefully in cotton wool, just to be sure...

Pavi!!!! said...

OMG! ur so accident prone! n u have more than butter fingers..u have butter toes, butter feet, butter arms..et all!

My initial mths in the US..as i was new to cooking..i wld cut a diff part of my hand EVERY day!n so..i have JUST butter fingers!

Pls do Take Care!n u forgot to add wats coming up??

Mama - Mia said...

oh i didnt elaborate that elbow dislocation meant plsater for 4 weeks and phuysiotherapy for ages till i got bored abnd gave up! have that tedha elbow thanks to laziness!! :(

and started off to say LOL at Robin's comment!

laughed really loud at one line comment! :D

cheers!

abha

Preethi said...

Robin- Knowing me I would probably wobble and fall!! :P
Pavi - Boohoo.. you think so?
Abha - Alright.. I have company ;) We can share the spot at the top.. am not relinquishing it :)

Suma said...

ms. butter fingers...have you done this tag before...if not...do not let this slip away...:D

come and take a look

Neera said...

Aiyyo!! You please be very careful Ms Butterfingers ..u gave me the scares! Yeah the last one was awful!

Prats said...

I know I shouldn't be laughing but I can't stop. I was like this too and was called the 'wounded soldier' throughout schooling. And now my sons take over. I'm convinced now about genetics..I dont need any more lessons.
But do take care girl...the family'll need you 'whole'

Vivek said...

Oh God, you cant have more than what you had! You are not deformed yet.. How come?!! :P

Take care!!

PG said...

goodness! the last one was scary.
Take good care of yoursself.
Butterfingers i have too, or butter hands maybe...I keep dropping things all the time and am quite clumsy that way and I'm sitting here with bruises on my fingers which i got in the kitchen, of course!

Preethi said...

Neera - Yes I try very hard!!!
Prats - Thank God I have company.. I was beginning to feel like a freak!! :D
Vivek - Yeah not yet deformed.. still whole!!
PG - Hehe.. like someone said.. its not just my fingers I guess!! :P

noon said...

Jeeez Preethi - I am not telling KB these stories - as it is he scares me by talking to me and walking straight ahead and not looking and ramming his head into the wall! Like Charlie Chaplin. And KG is ditto you. She has cut her lips so many times already. I can only prevent falls so much. My God, that last bit - sheeesh - scary! So that was some special kurma - thumbs up girl! :)

Fuzzylogic said...

LOL!It's always good to see that I have company. I'm called as an accident waiting to happen. But knieves are not my speciality:)That last one was indeed scary. You better not do it again. I think your family ought to put up a sigh no knieves allowed unless under supervision for you:)Take care Preethi.

DotThoughts said...

oh boy o boy!!! i am butter fingres too.. peirced my arm once trying to pit an avocado!!

noon said...

Yo Preethi! Move your fingers on the keyboard and type up a new post! When I don't check you have new posts. When I keep checking you don't have any new ones. What have you been up to? What's cheeky cheeky upto?

Sumana said...

Looks like the keyboard slipped away somewhere????

Pavi!!!! said...

Hello.. How n where have u been?!?

Wish u n ur family a Very happy Diwali..Hope u had a nice celebration!

Mystic Margarita said...

You be careful, girl. That's way too many mishaps, enough to last a lifetime. Happy to you and your family. You haven't posted in a while - hope everything's ok?